Opportunities

This past week was a busy one and that's one of the reasons I am thankful for only having a 3 day work week (actually it will be just a little more than that since I'll have to go to work on Friday in order to sign off on employee time cards so they can get paid).  Work will hopefully go by quickly each day since I have quite a bit to accomplish this week as well as my building will be filled with kids since school is closed this week.  When there's lots going on in the building, the day tends to go faster (we'll see if that happens this week or not...).

I feel as I have a bit of work to catch up on since I was out of the building for two days this past week.  I was out of the building to teach a two day customer service course that I was a little nervous about going in for.  It was the first time I taught the course and I was concerned that the individuals in the class wouldn't be active participants (and this course really depends on active participation).  I didn't have much to worry about.  The class took about 30-45 minutes to warm up and then they ended up being the perfect class.  They asked questions; answered questions; volunteered when asked; etc.  There was another class that happened earlier in the week and the facilitators had horror stories to tell (they said it was like pulling teeth to get their participants to do anything).  I was very thankful I ended up with the group that I did!  =)

I had the opportunity today to be the substitute dance teacher a couple of towns over since their instructor is in South Africa.  I actually get to teach for her the next two Sundays as well.  They told me that they were happy to be working with me over the next few weeks because they really enjoy my teaching style and they feel like they learn a lot.  Since I've been teaching dance for less than a year (other than running an occasional practice before that if my instructor had to be out), that's really good for me to hear.  Especially since after the last couple of my solo performances I wondered if I needed to take a dancing break or not...

I know that I have always been my own worst critic but I felt as if I did particularly poorly at the last two performances.  I had a talk with my instructor this past week about it and she said that it probably means that I am on the verge of a breakthrough in terms of my dancing.  I hope so because the last two dances left me questioning whether or not I should be dancing or teaching at all currently.  I think I am being overly hard on myself because I was dancing to new music and was attempting to go beyond the "tough girl" attitude for the entire dance.  I danced the first part with a veil which left me feeling more vulnerable than when I have my sword.  For the second part of the dance, I had my sword in hand and I felt a little more comfortable but the music was a little softer than what I usually dance to and it just wasn't the same as what I saw in my head.  I think I might continue to work with this piece of music but probably not for my next performance.  For the next show, I think I need to go back to the piece of music that I LOVE to build my confidence back.

With having the short work week/long weekend, I am really hoping to take the opportunity to do something for me.  I'm not sure yet what that something is going to be but I'm going to do it.  It might be as simple as taking a nap on the couch one day with the doggies.  I just know that I need to do something for me.  I know that a couple of weeks ago I went whale watching for me but that was one thing over quite a long period of time.  I think it's time to do things for me again - things that grant me the opportunity to let my freak flag fly.

Well, my dear readers, since we're open for full day programming this week, that means I'll be putting  in some long work days so I should probably think about heading to bed before too much longer.  Before doing that, I think I'm going to get some sort of a lunch together to take with me to work since I don't think I want to take care of that in the morning.  I'm also going to take a few minutes to think about the opportunities I've had this past week and the opportunities I hope to create for myself in the week ahead.  Hopefully I can remember to look at everything as an opportunity.  I hope you have a fabulous week, can find things to be thankful for and to take the opportunities to let your own freak flags fly!  =)

Survive

Good evening, dear readers!  Let me begin by telling you about my whale watching adventure that I decided to take myself on when I had a day off of work this past week.  I had the opportunity to see not only one but two Orca whales (which I've never seen outside of Sea World before) and at least 15-20 humpback whales during a "feeding frenzy."  We also got to see lots of dolphins and hundreds of sea lions playing in the ocean.  I was able to capture some amazing photos and a lot of photos that just ended up being of water.  I thought I had a picture of a mermaid but I think it was just a piece of kelp floating by.  Maybe next time...

I was very glad to start my week with this adventure because I ended up not having such a good week.  I don't know if I'm just putting too much pressure on myself in different aspects of my life but I had days this past week where I didn't feel as if I was doing anything right.  That wasn't a good place to mentally/emotionally be and I'm hoping that I can continue to work myself out of that place. Probably also didn't help that I ended up with a pretty nasty cold/laryngitis this past week so I didn't sleep well on top of everything else that was going on.

The combination of not being in a good place mentally/emotionally, being sick and not sleeping well made my thoughts turn to the wasband.  Tomorrow marks the five year point of him walking out and I am trying to think about all of the positive things that have happened in my life since that point.  Yes, I have had some ups and downs over that time because I don't want the alternative (where I spend the rest of my life wondering what could have been if we would've stayed together).  This year we have been separated as long as we were married.  That's kind of a shocking thought to me.  There are times I can't believe it's really been five years.

One of the things that I keep trying to remind myself is with all of the things that have happened in that time, I am still standing.  I may not be at the place in my life that I expected but I have survived and that's what's most important.  I have fallen in love with a new song and I think it's going to become my 'anthem.'  The song is "Roar" by Katy Perry.  There are times where I just feel let need to sing it at the top of my lungs and I seem to feel better when I do.  Every time I watch the music video for it I just have to giggle (the guy in it gets eaten by a tiger and I can't help but picture you know who when that happens; and no I'm not talking about Voldemort for you Harry Potter fans).

I know that there will come a time where I will be able to look back on this time in my life and know that it was a stepping stone to bigger and better things.  My Mom sent me something this week that I'm going to have to turn into a wallpaper or a print so I can remember it -- Never cry for the person who hurts you...  Just smile and say, "Thanks for giving me the chance to find someone better than you..."  That's going to be one to the next things I work on in my quest.

Well, my dear readers, I think I need to bring this to a close for the evening.  I have a busy week ahead of me with work (along with my regular work responsibilities, I have to teach a two day customer service class this week that I don't know that I'm ready for) so I should probably try and relax a little before heading to bed.  Along with everything, I know that I am really going to try and find opportunities to let my freak flag fly.  I hope you do the same!