Another year

Wow... I can't believe I am entering year 3 of writing Gypsy's Quest. While I know that I am making progress, there are days, like today where I personally feel as if I've had some pretty major setbacks. I mean, I guess if I didn't have the setbacks, I wouldn't appreciate the progress I have made, however, some setback days are worse than others....

Over the last couple of days I have been thinking about some accounts that were joint accounts between me and the wasband. Of course, he didn't close them so today I attempted to close two of them. The first one would barely give me the time of day and will only deal with him (on the plus side, the account has been closed and I've been told that neither one of us has access to it anymore). The second phone call I made today was much more productive and they were able to close the account upon my request (since I was on the account) and they said that they would take care of everything. I guess there are times where I just don't expect people (other than family and some friends) to go out of their way to help me out.

When I was dealing with some of these account issues, I ended up having to look in my "divorce box" and I came across some personal correspondence written by the wasband. I am going to give myself credit for knowing that I couldn't deal with that particular folder today and I put it back in the box and put the "divorce box" back into the cabinet. While I may be able to go through that folder one of these days and re-read those letters/notes, today was definitely not that day...

After a nice long talk with Mom and Dad today, I took my first bubble bath in over three years. I had to get creative in making that happen (since my bathtub has a catch on the drain but no stopper) but I was able to make it work (Yay! See, I'm already using one of my new mantras! Confused? See last weeks post...) Granted, I didn't get to stay in the tub for as long as I wanted to (silly dogs) but it is an indulgence that is relatively inexpensive (bubble bath is pretty cheap) and something that I will have to do again in the near future.

This goes back to recognizing that every so often I do have to take care of myself in order to be able to continue to take care of the needs of those around me. While I don't always think to make myself a priority, I know that I do need to try and make that happen or I am going to completely burn out mentally, emotionally and even physically. I am already nursing a sore ankle and I know that if I don't care of that, it's going to get worse, and then I won't be able to dance - - one of the main things I do to help keep myself active/happy/sane/etc.

Well, since I have a very busy/stressful week ahead of me at work (we are getting ready to complete a major upgrade of a website we use on a daily basis where we have to switch a lot of information over) and in dance (we have a big performance this coming Saturday - - parade in the AM and a performance at the county fair right after it where I will be performing my sword solo), I should probably bring this to a close and relax a little before bed.

Thank you for joining me as Year Two of Gypsy's Quest ends and I am looking forward to where Year Three may lead me on my quest and where it may lead you, my dear readers. =)

Mantras....

One of my newest mantras is going to become "make it work," I think. In my opinion, I can use this in several aspects of my life - I can use it at work, in dance, in my writing, etc. There are times where making it work is the only option you have. I am not the type that gives up easily (as I'm sure you have determined from some of my other writings) so sometimes the only alternative is to find a way to make it work with what you are given. Granted, it may not always be the most desirable thing to make things work with what you have at your disposal and you may wish you had something different; however, wishing will only get you so far...

Another mantra that I need to learn to apply to my life is, "don't help." Let me explain... I had a dance performance tonight and I stumbled over a floor mat, hurting an ankle that I have already injured. Of course, the show must go on so I continued to dance. I know, I know - - stupid decision on my part. Anyway, after we managed to get to my instructor's house after the show, my instructor's husband rubbed my ankle for me. As he was manipulating my ankle to try and feel for an injury, he had to keep telling me, "Gypsy, don't help!" Unknowingly, I was attempting to move my ankle in anticipation of what he was trying to do. Once I stopped trying to help, the injury really did start to feel better.

For those of you who know me, being told to not help, usually makes me tense up or want to do something even more. Tonight, for whatever reason, when he told me, "don't help," I stopped trying to help. I don't know if it was his tone of voice, the way he was helping my ankle, or what, he actually put me at ease. All I can say is my dance instructor is a lucky woman having this man as her husband. =)

After we danced tonight, I had a couple of people come up to me and compliment me on my dancing. One of the people who approached me has been dancing for quite a long time and I consider her to be a fabulous dancer. When she came up to me, she told me that she LOVES my energy and LOVES to watch me dance. I told her that meant a lot to me coming from her. She then asked me how long I had been dancing and I told her that it will be two years this coming November - - she told me that she found that difficult to believe because I don't dance like I've only been dancing for two years. Other people told me that out of the three other dancers I was performing with tonight, they couldn't keep their eyes off of me. Even though my ankle was sore, those comments made me feel amazing!

Well, I know that I didn't write as much as I usually do tonight, but I should probably continue to take care of this ankle of mine and get ready for bed since the alarm is going to beep really early in the morning to wake me up for work. Have a great week everyone! =)