Some people say, "winter is coming..." but at the moment, I'm focused on "my POD is coming..." I am trying not to overly freak out that my move is rapidly approaching and I don't feel even remotely prepared for it. I am trying to listen to people when they tell me to just take things one step at a time and it will all come together; unfortunately the little voice in my head is sometimes louder than those around me and it tells me that using the wrong kind of tape on my boxes is going to effect what job/housing situation I am going to end up with when I move. Yes, I may be more than slightly crazy but it's pretty typical for someone who belongs to my very, how should I say this, eclectic family.
I feel as if I got quite a bit accomplished to prepare for my move over this long weekend but looking around my apartment, I know I didn't accomplish near enough... I tried to balance work and play some over this weekend and there was some time spent away from the process. On Thanksgiving, I spend some time over at my dance instructor's house; every year she collects "orphans" (people who don't have anywhere else to go for Thanksgiving) to her house for Thanksgiving dinner. I skipped last year but felt as if I should go this year since it will be my last opportunity to attend. On Black Friday, I participated in my own tradition of taking myself to the movies instead of partaking in the insanity of shopping - I used to have movie theaters to myself (or a very small group of other people) but this year, there were about 20 other people at the movies. I have already invited my sister-in-law to join me at the movies next year because she said that sounded like more fun than her usually working on Black Friday (even though she doesn't work retail).
When I wasn't "playing" this weekend, I went though my kitchen cupboards/freezer/fridge and cleaned them out, I went through the clothes in my closet (and donated lots of bags of clothes/shoes), and I boxed up all of my kid's books (for teaching) and my books. I have sore muscles that I didn't think were possible and I know I should have accomplished lots more but I am proud for what I did get done. Going into this week, I am hoping to come up with a list of things to try to accomplish each day off of work because there has always been something very satisfying to crossing things off of a to-do list for me.
Some of the other things I have to cross off my to-do this week is I have an interview tomorrow afternoon, I need to call to find information out in regards to my car lease, and I need to tell the parents/kids that I'll be leaving. Even though I know that I need to tell them, I'm not sure how my announcement is going to be received. Working where I do, people are constantly coming and going for different reasons but I have been here in once capacity or another for just shy of nine years. I know that I would like to give them a heads up so they (the parents and the kids) can ask any questions they would like to ask and I can hopefully give them answers - they may not necessarily be the answers they're looking for but I can give it my best shot.
Well my dear readers, I should probably bring this to a close for this evening and start my to-do list so I can work on crossing items off of it as I go. Since time is drawing short to the start of the next leg of my quest, I would ask if you're the praying type, please say a prayer for this Gypsy. Thank you for joining me, my dear readers! =)
Sunday, November 27, 2016
Sunday, November 20, 2016
Adventures...
The adventure of my leap of faith is starting to get real; I wrote my official resignation letter today which I will present to my boss tomorrow. Once I've given my official resignation, I will start to tell the kids at work and their families. Even though many of them will be on vacation this week since school is out, I will probably send out the first email to them either tomorrow or Tuesday and follow up with a hard copy written notice the following week. I know that it's going to be difficult telling the kids and their families but I figure I should start telling them sooner rather than later so they can ask their questions and hear about it from me.
This past week at work we had a staff meeting where I announced that I would be leaving next month. It also came up today at church that I'll be leaving, too. At both places, the strangest reaction happened - I had people coming up to me telling me how much they're going to miss me and they don't want me to leave - all of which was a shock to me. This reaction is coming from people who have often treated me as if I've invisible or they look at me like I'm the outcast they can't wait to get rid of. The fact that they reacted like this, just kind of threw me for a loop.
In my work around the apartment this weekend, I took the family photos that I had displayed on a shelf down, wrapped them and put them in a box. That simple act already has this apartment feeling less like "home". In living here, I was told not to put any holes in the walls so family photos were displayed on a shelf while others never made it out of a box. Granted, the ones that stayed in the box now contain the ex's of three out of four kids in the family so it's probably better that they remained in a box. With me living closer to the rest of my family maybe we can have some new photos taken with the current members of the family for me to put up in my new home/apartment or wherever I end up. I realized that even the photos I have of my nephews are a couple of years old at this point but they are the ones that I have; so with them coming down off the shelves, it already makes it seem more empty.
I know that in order to make this move, it's going to have to feel less like home in order to get everything packed away and actually move. I think part of it is bringing up some memories/emotions of the last time I moved (after the divorce was finalized) but I'm trying hard not to necessarily dwell on those feelings. Maybe part of it is also coming from the time of year it is - this is the time of the year that the wasband walked out leaving only a letter. I am trying to realize how far I have come in the last 8 years but sometimes it's difficult to push those memories/emotions away. I guess this is all part of my quest...
Last night, in order to help remind me about my quest, I watched "Man of LaMancha" while I was looking through boxes. That's always been one of those movies that helps to put my quest in perspective - Don Quixote was the persona of a mad man who dreamed of a life of chivalry who became a knight errant. Some might say that my quest to move cross country is mad but sometimes the maddest of quests means you make the best of friends (as Don Quixote had Sancho and Duncinea) and your story is remembered. Those things sound pretty good to me.
Well, my dear readers, I should probably bring this to a close for the evening. The kids don't have school this week so we have three days of full day programming (from 7 am - 6 pm) so we'll see what kind of trouble we can get into. Thank you for joining me along this quest and I hope you take some time this week to reflect on what you're thankful for. I am thankful for you, my dear readers! =)
This past week at work we had a staff meeting where I announced that I would be leaving next month. It also came up today at church that I'll be leaving, too. At both places, the strangest reaction happened - I had people coming up to me telling me how much they're going to miss me and they don't want me to leave - all of which was a shock to me. This reaction is coming from people who have often treated me as if I've invisible or they look at me like I'm the outcast they can't wait to get rid of. The fact that they reacted like this, just kind of threw me for a loop.
In my work around the apartment this weekend, I took the family photos that I had displayed on a shelf down, wrapped them and put them in a box. That simple act already has this apartment feeling less like "home". In living here, I was told not to put any holes in the walls so family photos were displayed on a shelf while others never made it out of a box. Granted, the ones that stayed in the box now contain the ex's of three out of four kids in the family so it's probably better that they remained in a box. With me living closer to the rest of my family maybe we can have some new photos taken with the current members of the family for me to put up in my new home/apartment or wherever I end up. I realized that even the photos I have of my nephews are a couple of years old at this point but they are the ones that I have; so with them coming down off the shelves, it already makes it seem more empty.
I know that in order to make this move, it's going to have to feel less like home in order to get everything packed away and actually move. I think part of it is bringing up some memories/emotions of the last time I moved (after the divorce was finalized) but I'm trying hard not to necessarily dwell on those feelings. Maybe part of it is also coming from the time of year it is - this is the time of the year that the wasband walked out leaving only a letter. I am trying to realize how far I have come in the last 8 years but sometimes it's difficult to push those memories/emotions away. I guess this is all part of my quest...
Last night, in order to help remind me about my quest, I watched "Man of LaMancha" while I was looking through boxes. That's always been one of those movies that helps to put my quest in perspective - Don Quixote was the persona of a mad man who dreamed of a life of chivalry who became a knight errant. Some might say that my quest to move cross country is mad but sometimes the maddest of quests means you make the best of friends (as Don Quixote had Sancho and Duncinea) and your story is remembered. Those things sound pretty good to me.
Well, my dear readers, I should probably bring this to a close for the evening. The kids don't have school this week so we have three days of full day programming (from 7 am - 6 pm) so we'll see what kind of trouble we can get into. Thank you for joining me along this quest and I hope you take some time this week to reflect on what you're thankful for. I am thankful for you, my dear readers! =)
Sunday, November 13, 2016
Leap of Faith
I currently feel as if I'm standing on the edge of a precipice, with one foot extended, as I prepare to step forward... That may sound overly dramatic but I am on the edge of something dramatic - I am preparing to take a leap of faith and move approximately 2400 miles cross country. The thought of it has me somewhat scared to death but the decision has also left me with an overwhelming sense of calm. I told my boss this past week that I'm going to be putting in my notice by the end of the year and it did not go over well; she even asked me if there was anything she could do to convince me to change my mind - the answer is "no." Telling my staff was hard but they are all encouraging me to follow what my heart is telling me and my heart is telling me to go. I haven't told the parents or the kids yet and I'm sure those conversations are going to be the most difficult... Actually, I've told a couple of the parents because I've asked if I could use them as references.
I have been debating this move for some time and feel as if my landlords letting me know about selling their home has been the kick in the butt I've been waiting for in order to make this decision. I have more decisions to make in this process but the decision to move has at least been made. I have started to go through things in my apartment and have been trying to determine what to take with me, what to try and sell, and what I just want/need to get rid of. Going through stuff has made my dogs even more neurotic than usual because they can definitely sense that something is going on; even if they don't understand what that is. Because my dogs are older, I'm hoping that they do okay with this entire process. The one has a tendency to get car sick so that's going to be an adventure in and of itself...
One of the things that has been both emotional and has brought some closure is throwing away some things from the wasband's and my failed marriage. I'm not throwing away everything (finding some of the photos from our wedding day did bring a smile to my face) but I am getting rid of love letters I've found and the journals I kept during his time out to sea. I'm not sure why I kept those things when the divorce became finalized but I think I am ready to get rid of those things and move on with my life.
Another thing I did today in order to move on with my life is I was going through my closet, getting rid of some clothes and I came across my wedding dress. The dress I wore to my wedding was a formal crushed velvet dress with a faux fur wrap around the shoulders with a mermaid tail train. The wedding dress made it's way into the bag of donated clothes and the bags made their way to the donation site today. Also in the donation bag went the wedding night nightgown/robe and the outfit I wore to my brother's wedding the day the wasband and I met. I wasn't ready to get rid of these items after the divorce was finalized but I think it was definitely important for me to get rid of them before moving. In a sense I am closing this entire chapter of my life in order to take the next step.
Along with other emotional things from this weekend, today I had my final performance at the dance studio. We haven't had a night like this at the studio in some time but we transformed the studio into a nightclub and had the chance to sign up and perform. The troupe opened the show with a few of our group choreographies and then towards the end of the show, I danced a solo. Since it was the last time I would have the opportunity to solo at the studio, I decided to dance the first solo tonight that I ever danced at the studio (a middle eastern version of "I Put a Spell on You") and then I danced to one of the group choreographies that has kind of become "my" dance - our Story dance. When my instructor introduced me, she said that it was going to be my last performance at the studio and some of the dancers got emotional. Even though it was emotional for me too, I was able to keep it together and give almost the performance I wanted - I wish I would have done more with the first piece but doing my first piece "one more time" at the studio was a little overwhelming today. I am glad I danced both of the pieces though.
Well my dear readers, after this emotional weekend as I stand on the edge of this precipice preparing to take my leap of faith, I should probably bring this to a close for this evening. I have at least one job interview lined up this week and I'm hoping for a few more possibilities to come my way so please keep your fingers crossed or say a prayer for me - this Gypsy would appreciate it! Thank you for joining me along this next section of my quest! =)
I have been debating this move for some time and feel as if my landlords letting me know about selling their home has been the kick in the butt I've been waiting for in order to make this decision. I have more decisions to make in this process but the decision to move has at least been made. I have started to go through things in my apartment and have been trying to determine what to take with me, what to try and sell, and what I just want/need to get rid of. Going through stuff has made my dogs even more neurotic than usual because they can definitely sense that something is going on; even if they don't understand what that is. Because my dogs are older, I'm hoping that they do okay with this entire process. The one has a tendency to get car sick so that's going to be an adventure in and of itself...
One of the things that has been both emotional and has brought some closure is throwing away some things from the wasband's and my failed marriage. I'm not throwing away everything (finding some of the photos from our wedding day did bring a smile to my face) but I am getting rid of love letters I've found and the journals I kept during his time out to sea. I'm not sure why I kept those things when the divorce became finalized but I think I am ready to get rid of those things and move on with my life.
Another thing I did today in order to move on with my life is I was going through my closet, getting rid of some clothes and I came across my wedding dress. The dress I wore to my wedding was a formal crushed velvet dress with a faux fur wrap around the shoulders with a mermaid tail train. The wedding dress made it's way into the bag of donated clothes and the bags made their way to the donation site today. Also in the donation bag went the wedding night nightgown/robe and the outfit I wore to my brother's wedding the day the wasband and I met. I wasn't ready to get rid of these items after the divorce was finalized but I think it was definitely important for me to get rid of them before moving. In a sense I am closing this entire chapter of my life in order to take the next step.
Along with other emotional things from this weekend, today I had my final performance at the dance studio. We haven't had a night like this at the studio in some time but we transformed the studio into a nightclub and had the chance to sign up and perform. The troupe opened the show with a few of our group choreographies and then towards the end of the show, I danced a solo. Since it was the last time I would have the opportunity to solo at the studio, I decided to dance the first solo tonight that I ever danced at the studio (a middle eastern version of "I Put a Spell on You") and then I danced to one of the group choreographies that has kind of become "my" dance - our Story dance. When my instructor introduced me, she said that it was going to be my last performance at the studio and some of the dancers got emotional. Even though it was emotional for me too, I was able to keep it together and give almost the performance I wanted - I wish I would have done more with the first piece but doing my first piece "one more time" at the studio was a little overwhelming today. I am glad I danced both of the pieces though.
Well my dear readers, after this emotional weekend as I stand on the edge of this precipice preparing to take my leap of faith, I should probably bring this to a close for this evening. I have at least one job interview lined up this week and I'm hoping for a few more possibilities to come my way so please keep your fingers crossed or say a prayer for me - this Gypsy would appreciate it! Thank you for joining me along this next section of my quest! =)
Sunday, November 6, 2016
disjointed...
I haven't started one of my posts with a disclaimer in awhile but I'm starting with one tonight - I am getting a pretty late start on my writing tonight so I'm not sure how long of a post this is going to be or if it's going to make a whole lot of sense or not... So, I guess I'm encouraging you to read at your own risk (even though I do want you to continue reading).
This past week, I started going through some things in my apartment to start the daunting task of deciding what to keep and what to purge with my impending move. I unfortunately didn't get as far this weekend as I had hoped to but the boxes I started with were filled with memories - some good and some not so good. I was hoping to start going through my closet today but I didn't make it there. This is a short week at work (we get Friday off for Veteran's Day but I might have to go in for an hour or so to sign off on payroll) and I may or may not end up at jury duty (yes, as if I don't have enough on my plate, I have been potentially been summoned for jury duty) but my goal is to go through my closet by this time next week.
As I go through some of my boxes, I know that some of the contents I'll be able to take into work and the kids/teens will be able to use them for their own creative purposes. I have some boxes that I haven't really been in since I've moved here (back in 2009) and while some of that has been because I don't have much space here I guess part of it means I don't necessarily need what's in some of those boxes. I know some stuff I might be able to sell or just give away and other stuff I think it just might be time to throw it away. Hopefully that motivation will continue as I start going through boxes; I guess only time will tell...
I'm trying to not take the stress of packing up my apartment and trying to find a new place on my coworkers but one of them in particular is starting to get to me. In a couple of different ways she's wanting everyone to go out of their way for her but she's not necessarily willing to reciprocate. She's telling me that she's putting in all of this extra time so now she wants time off - which I'm not opposed to her getting but with other things going on in the building and her aspect of programming, there isn't a whole lot of time to be had for her to be off. I guess I will figure out how to work some magic in order to make it happen...
As I'm sitting here, I am becoming overwhelmed again by the amount of work I have to put into this apartment in order to get ready to move so I think I need to put this away for tonight so I can calm down so I can get some sleep tonight. Tomorrow should be interesting going into work because even though we gained an extra hour this weekend due to daylight savings, any time we "fall back" or "spring forward," it makes the kids crazy. I apologize for how disjointed tonight's post was but I did put a disclaimer at the beginning... Thank you for your love/support during this new facet of my quest and thank you for joining me, my dear readers! =)
This past week, I started going through some things in my apartment to start the daunting task of deciding what to keep and what to purge with my impending move. I unfortunately didn't get as far this weekend as I had hoped to but the boxes I started with were filled with memories - some good and some not so good. I was hoping to start going through my closet today but I didn't make it there. This is a short week at work (we get Friday off for Veteran's Day but I might have to go in for an hour or so to sign off on payroll) and I may or may not end up at jury duty (yes, as if I don't have enough on my plate, I have been potentially been summoned for jury duty) but my goal is to go through my closet by this time next week.
As I go through some of my boxes, I know that some of the contents I'll be able to take into work and the kids/teens will be able to use them for their own creative purposes. I have some boxes that I haven't really been in since I've moved here (back in 2009) and while some of that has been because I don't have much space here I guess part of it means I don't necessarily need what's in some of those boxes. I know some stuff I might be able to sell or just give away and other stuff I think it just might be time to throw it away. Hopefully that motivation will continue as I start going through boxes; I guess only time will tell...
I'm trying to not take the stress of packing up my apartment and trying to find a new place on my coworkers but one of them in particular is starting to get to me. In a couple of different ways she's wanting everyone to go out of their way for her but she's not necessarily willing to reciprocate. She's telling me that she's putting in all of this extra time so now she wants time off - which I'm not opposed to her getting but with other things going on in the building and her aspect of programming, there isn't a whole lot of time to be had for her to be off. I guess I will figure out how to work some magic in order to make it happen...
As I'm sitting here, I am becoming overwhelmed again by the amount of work I have to put into this apartment in order to get ready to move so I think I need to put this away for tonight so I can calm down so I can get some sleep tonight. Tomorrow should be interesting going into work because even though we gained an extra hour this weekend due to daylight savings, any time we "fall back" or "spring forward," it makes the kids crazy. I apologize for how disjointed tonight's post was but I did put a disclaimer at the beginning... Thank you for your love/support during this new facet of my quest and thank you for joining me, my dear readers! =)
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
