I'm not entirely sure what I've done in order to anger the travel gods but I have done one heck of a good job at it! Why you might ask? Let me tell you...
About 27 hours ago now, I was packing my suitcase in order to leave Mom and Dad's (which we already know from past writings that I don't do well with goodbyes in any way, shape or form) and was just about to head to bed. My phone was on the nightstand, was on silent, and it buzzed once - which for my phone signifies an email. I usually only get junk emails in the middle of the night so I almost ignored it. Something told me to just check it since it would only take about 2.5 seconds to delete said junk email. Was I ever glad I checked it... It was an email from the airline telling me at midnight that my 4 pm flight was cancelled. Rather than just waiting (as the email suggested), I got on the phone with the airline. After being informed by the robot voice that my call was very important to them, I was told that my wait time would be approximately an hour! Being it was the middle of the night, I was obviously not amused...
Since I didn't have much else to do in the middle of the night while I was on hold (since I didn't want to wake up my parents or their dogs), I began to search for possible alternative flights. I found there was one out of an airport about 2.5 hours from my parent's a few minutes before a customer service representative answered the phone. They said they were sorry about my situation after I explained what had happened (even though I could hear in their voice that they were more indifferent) and they didn't see any flights until the next day and then they couldn't guarantee any connecting flights after that point. I brought up the flight I had found and they didn't know what I was talking about. I had to give them the flight number (in which they responded, "you DO realize what airport that's out of, right?"; yes, I do since I found the flight)) and then they were able to book me on that flight.
I left a note in the bathroom for my parents to find in the morning and then I went to bed. After a few hours of broken sleep, I got up to inform my parents about what had happened in the middle of the night. They drove me to the airport that my flight was now out of and while I was sitting at the gate, I got another email from the airline. The next connecting flight along my journey was already slated to be delayed at least 2 hours and they were still hoping I would make the next (and final) connection. Yeah, that didn't happen... The connecting flight was about the 2 hours late, I missed my connection and am on the AM flight from this airport. So, I find myself sitting overnight in an airport yet again...
Granted, I did talk to a ticket agent a little bit ago and they actually presented me with a hotel voucher (there is a first for everything!). I am glad though that one of their comments made me pause and I did a check on the hotel they wanted me to spend the night in... Their comment was they had "stuck" me there for the night (they also told me there were no other options unless I wanted to pay for a hotel room out of pocket) and they shook their head. As I walked away, that really didn't sit well with me. Before walking out through the point of no return of the airport, I stopped and checked the reviews of this particular hotel on my phone and boy am I glad I did! "Dirty." "Creepy vibe/evil." "Didn't get much sleep." Comments like that didn't really sit well with me... I figured I would be safer at the airport so I stayed. Time will tell if that was the correct decision or not...
Yes, I may have been able to get a couple of hours of sleep but maybe not. I also didn't relish the thought of having to go through airline security yet again (because I would've needed to get up very early in the AM in order to catch the shuttle from the hotel to the airport and then go through all of the security checkpoints again). Oh, well. I made my decision and if it was a good one or not I have to live with the consequences of said decision (travel voucher "expired" 20-25 minutes ago).
I guess what I wish is that this isn't how my travel experience ended. I had a GREAT time visiting with family these past couple of weeks and now this is how it wraps up. Yes, the story of it is an adventurous one but I just want to not be in an airport anymore... I guess how I just need to learn how to look at things is I can't let this mishap of getting from my parent's house back to my apartment ruin my trip as a whole. Yes, it can frustrate me and make me want to pull my hair out - but what good will that do? I'm sure at this point you're asking yourself, "why in the world is she just figuring that out now after we've read her ranting and raving about it?!?" (at least I hope you're still reading at this point...). You know me at this point, my dear readers, and sometimes I just need to get things out of my system.
As I said, I had a GREAT time visiting with family and am already looking forward to the next opportunity I'll have to be with them all again. Well, my dear readers, I think I'm going to bring this to a close for this evening (very early morning), I wish you all the very best for the New Year ahead and can't wait to write to you again on the flip side of 2014! Be safe out there! =)
Monday, December 30, 2013
Sunday, December 22, 2013
"At least it's not snowing..."
"Well... At least it's not snowing!" I have heard that phrase quite a bit in the last week and I (for one) am tired of hearing it. For the last number of days it has done nothing but rain and be cold at my parent's house and while there is still a little bit of snow on the ground (they had some pretty good snow last weekend), it is difficult for me to think that Christmas is a few days away. Because of where I grew up, I have almost always equated snow with the Christmas season. Living where I do now, I find it difficult to get excited about Christmas when the temperature rarely changes and the most precipitation you'll get for the holidays is rain (maybe fog but more likely it will be rain). I love snow and while there was quite a bit on the ground and more falling when I was visiting my Grandma, I'm going to be a bit greedy and say that I want more snow before I leave next week...
This past week was a whirlwind of driving to see my Grandma (my Mom's mom) and coming back to my parent's house. Dad went with me and we had a very nice trip in my opinion. He drove the areas along the way that I wasn't thrilled with traffic wise (which I greatly appreciated) and then he let me drive through the blizzard as he took a nap. =) After getting past the area along the trip that I didn't really want to drive, Dad said it was time to switch so he could close his eyes for a bit. Since he had driven that section that makes me tense, I quickly hopped in the driver's seat. He laughed when I got super exited that I didn't have to move his seat so I could reach the pedals but I could move the pedals themselves (yes, I was easily impressed)! I began to drive and he shut his eyes. As I was driving along, the sky was getting more and more grey. Then the snow began to fall - little flakes at first but then they got bigger and more of their friends came to play. There were places I was driving where it was difficult to see the person driving in front of me and where the white lines along the side of the road were. Despite that, we made it safely to our destination.
Yes, there were some moments of very tense shoulders and hand cramps from gripping the steering wheel but I would have much preferred to drive through the snow that I did than drive in the rain. I am one who when it's raining is not a happy camper. I know lots of people who love the rain - the love watching/listening to it; they love to be out in it; they just plain enjoy the rain. I am definitely not one of those people...
I had a great time visiting with my Grandma (it's been a number of years since I have seen her) but it was too quick of trip in my opinion. I knew it was going to be a whirlwind of a trip from the start but I wish that I would have had the opportunity to spend more time with her. My Grandma has always understood me in a way that only my parent's have understood me. While it was a little strange for me to be in her house again (it's been some time since I've been there), it was full of childhood memories and we had nice long conversations. I had the opportunity to see one of my uncles and aunts and their daughter while I was up there too so it was a great trip!
Driving back to my parent's house we stopped to have a quick meal with my Grandpa (my Dad's dad) and we ended up spending the night in a hotel. Dad was flipping through channels and we came across an Aliens marathon. We watched the end of the first one and the beginning of the second one before deciding to turn off the TV since it didn't make sense to keep watching it if I haven't seen any of the Alien movies. Next morning, bright and early, we were back on the road. Luckily there wasn't another blizzard but we ended up coming across quite a bit of road construction. One of the things that helped to pass the time was an app Dad had on his iPad called Waze. Shameless plug -- if you don't have this app it is a TON of fun if you have to drive any sort of a distance because you have other people telling you about travel conditions ahead of you and if you warn other drivers about hazards, you get points (SIX POINTS!) Even though we didn't ever really figure out what the points were for, it was still fun (we figured we were having so much fun with it since we were pretty loopy from our whirlwind trip at that point).
Back to the rain... Standing in the cold rain last night for about an hour and a half solidifies the fact that I do not like the rain. I asked my sister if I could take my oldest nephew to see live reindeer in an open shopping plaza last night and she thought he would love it. He invited his Oma and Opa along (my parents), so the four of us went. While it was lots of fun to watch him pet Jingle Belle and Candy Cane (the two reindeer), it was not fun to do so in the cold rain. We then saw a group of people lined up to go into a small gingerbread looking house nearby. Of course we joined the line of people who were standing in line to see Santa. Luckily we were some of the few who had umbrellas but even huddling under them we were freezing. Santa (when we finally go in to see him) was fabulous and was everything you think Santa looks like. My nephew and his Oma had matching reindeer hats which Santa loved! The picture of my nephew and Santa is adorable (the only good thing that came from standing outside in the cold were his little cheeks were as rosy as could be) and I'm excited that I get to take one of the prints home with me (it will probably find itself sitting on my desk at work at least for a little bit once I have to go back).
One of the other things that has happened this past week is I have been introduced to another TV series. I was introduced to it against my will, been forced to watch episodes of it and I hate to say I have been sucked in... My parents (and a couple of other family members) couldn't believe I hadn't watched any episodes of Dr. Who so I had to be introduced/indoctrinated. We have almost completed season one of the new series and we will probably watch more episodes tonight.
Well, if I am going to watch more adventures of the TARDIS tonight and with another whirlwind week ahead, I should probably bring this to a close. Already planned for this upcoming week is a birthday party for my oldest nephew, ice skating with one of my brother's and his girlfriend, Christmas festivities, a basketball game and who knows what other sort of troubles we'll find ourselves in. I wish each and every one of you dear readers a very Merry Christmas and I hope you are able to spend time with loved ones (and that there is no rain but there is snow).
This past week was a whirlwind of driving to see my Grandma (my Mom's mom) and coming back to my parent's house. Dad went with me and we had a very nice trip in my opinion. He drove the areas along the way that I wasn't thrilled with traffic wise (which I greatly appreciated) and then he let me drive through the blizzard as he took a nap. =) After getting past the area along the trip that I didn't really want to drive, Dad said it was time to switch so he could close his eyes for a bit. Since he had driven that section that makes me tense, I quickly hopped in the driver's seat. He laughed when I got super exited that I didn't have to move his seat so I could reach the pedals but I could move the pedals themselves (yes, I was easily impressed)! I began to drive and he shut his eyes. As I was driving along, the sky was getting more and more grey. Then the snow began to fall - little flakes at first but then they got bigger and more of their friends came to play. There were places I was driving where it was difficult to see the person driving in front of me and where the white lines along the side of the road were. Despite that, we made it safely to our destination.
Yes, there were some moments of very tense shoulders and hand cramps from gripping the steering wheel but I would have much preferred to drive through the snow that I did than drive in the rain. I am one who when it's raining is not a happy camper. I know lots of people who love the rain - the love watching/listening to it; they love to be out in it; they just plain enjoy the rain. I am definitely not one of those people...
I had a great time visiting with my Grandma (it's been a number of years since I have seen her) but it was too quick of trip in my opinion. I knew it was going to be a whirlwind of a trip from the start but I wish that I would have had the opportunity to spend more time with her. My Grandma has always understood me in a way that only my parent's have understood me. While it was a little strange for me to be in her house again (it's been some time since I've been there), it was full of childhood memories and we had nice long conversations. I had the opportunity to see one of my uncles and aunts and their daughter while I was up there too so it was a great trip!
Driving back to my parent's house we stopped to have a quick meal with my Grandpa (my Dad's dad) and we ended up spending the night in a hotel. Dad was flipping through channels and we came across an Aliens marathon. We watched the end of the first one and the beginning of the second one before deciding to turn off the TV since it didn't make sense to keep watching it if I haven't seen any of the Alien movies. Next morning, bright and early, we were back on the road. Luckily there wasn't another blizzard but we ended up coming across quite a bit of road construction. One of the things that helped to pass the time was an app Dad had on his iPad called Waze. Shameless plug -- if you don't have this app it is a TON of fun if you have to drive any sort of a distance because you have other people telling you about travel conditions ahead of you and if you warn other drivers about hazards, you get points (SIX POINTS!) Even though we didn't ever really figure out what the points were for, it was still fun (we figured we were having so much fun with it since we were pretty loopy from our whirlwind trip at that point).
Back to the rain... Standing in the cold rain last night for about an hour and a half solidifies the fact that I do not like the rain. I asked my sister if I could take my oldest nephew to see live reindeer in an open shopping plaza last night and she thought he would love it. He invited his Oma and Opa along (my parents), so the four of us went. While it was lots of fun to watch him pet Jingle Belle and Candy Cane (the two reindeer), it was not fun to do so in the cold rain. We then saw a group of people lined up to go into a small gingerbread looking house nearby. Of course we joined the line of people who were standing in line to see Santa. Luckily we were some of the few who had umbrellas but even huddling under them we were freezing. Santa (when we finally go in to see him) was fabulous and was everything you think Santa looks like. My nephew and his Oma had matching reindeer hats which Santa loved! The picture of my nephew and Santa is adorable (the only good thing that came from standing outside in the cold were his little cheeks were as rosy as could be) and I'm excited that I get to take one of the prints home with me (it will probably find itself sitting on my desk at work at least for a little bit once I have to go back).
One of the other things that has happened this past week is I have been introduced to another TV series. I was introduced to it against my will, been forced to watch episodes of it and I hate to say I have been sucked in... My parents (and a couple of other family members) couldn't believe I hadn't watched any episodes of Dr. Who so I had to be introduced/indoctrinated. We have almost completed season one of the new series and we will probably watch more episodes tonight.
Well, if I am going to watch more adventures of the TARDIS tonight and with another whirlwind week ahead, I should probably bring this to a close. Already planned for this upcoming week is a birthday party for my oldest nephew, ice skating with one of my brother's and his girlfriend, Christmas festivities, a basketball game and who knows what other sort of troubles we'll find ourselves in. I wish each and every one of you dear readers a very Merry Christmas and I hope you are able to spend time with loved ones (and that there is no rain but there is snow).
Sunday, December 15, 2013
Journey/Adventures
Another week has come and gone and I find myself sitting in front of the keyboard yet again. This week I'm not writing from my usual keyboard but it's my bright red travel keyboard. Luckily though I am not writing to you from an airport this time but from my parent's living room in a chair right next to the Christmas tree we decorated last night. This was one of the big things I mentioned last week that I had to prepare for but let's start at the beginning of the week...
I knew going into the week that I would have several large projects to take care of at work before coming on my extended vacation. I had a few meetings, a couple of on-line trainings, had schedules to create/modify, had a list of things to go over with a relatively new employee who had to take on my responsibilities while I'm away, say good-bye to a coworker who was leaving, etc. It was an exhausting week just from going to work alone... Thankfully I got everything accomplished at work that I set out to do (and I even did an out of office email message and phone message - two things I have never done before) and I feel confident that things will run just fine without me for the time that I'm away.
Because I felt as if I had so much work to accomplish this past week, I was unable to accomplish everything I wanted to around my apartment before leaving on my vacation. Honestly, I just plain ran out of time. There were several things that I kept telling myself I would put off because I still had plenty of time before I left - and then, I simply had no time left. I finished packing my suitcase at midnight the night I left because I hadn't taken care of that earlier (that wasn't one of my brightest moves since I needed to be up at about 3 AM to shower/get ready and then head to the airport for my very early flight). Oh, well. All lessons for next time I guess. Start getting ready for vacation earlier and that's that. Granted, I can't worry about the things I feel as if I didn't accomplish before my trip because they will still be sitting there waiting for me to take care of them upon my return.
I'm probably going to jinx my return trip already by saying thankfully my flights to my parent's were uneventful except for having to inform a gentleman that he was occupying my seat on one of the planes. I had upgraded one of my seats to an exit row seat (it was a few hour flight) and I informed the gentleman that it was my seat. I could tell he was a big guy and would've probably enjoyed sitting in the seat with more leg room (he even tried to convince me to just take his seat since he "was already settled into the seat" and I stood up for myself and told him that it was my seat. He ended up moving and I felt pretty good about not just giving into him. =)
I've only been here for two days (three nights) and quite a bit has already taken place. My parents picked me up at the airport and when we got back to their house, my sister, her husband and two kids were pulling up to the house and they were here visiting for a couple of hours. Overnight we then got a "snow storm" and we woke up to a number of inches of snow and the snow was still falling. In the midst of this blizzard, my sister came to pick me up and take me to the tattoo parlor. It probably wasn't the smartest thing we could've done after all that snow but I am very happy with the result (more on the new tattoo in a minute). Late last night I got a phone call from my (almost) 6 year old nephew asking me if I wanted to go with him to see Santa today so after church with my parents we went to see Santa.
So, about my new tattoo... I have been sending messages back and forth to the artist who did my tattoo this summer with an idea I had for a tattoo for Gypsy's Quest. I told him that it was the name of my blog, the types of things that I write about and that I wanted a tattoo representation of that. I left a lot of the details up to him (other than me telling him that I didn't want the words in the tattoo itself). He sent me a drawing this past week and I fell in love with his design and the imagery he came up with. The tattoo is of a gypsy girl, holding a lantern and coming out of the shadows. In my opinion she has a very determined look on her face and she seems ready to face whatever obstacles in her way. The tattoo takes up my entire forearm and it's pretty sore but I am very impressed with it overall and it will always serve as a visual representation of me and my journey.
Well my dear readers, I should probably bring this to a close for this evening for tomorrow my Dad and I head off of another adventure and we drive about 12 hours away to see my Grandma. I think it will be a very fun trip and I'm sure I'll write about it next week. Have a great week along whatever journey life takes you on!
I knew going into the week that I would have several large projects to take care of at work before coming on my extended vacation. I had a few meetings, a couple of on-line trainings, had schedules to create/modify, had a list of things to go over with a relatively new employee who had to take on my responsibilities while I'm away, say good-bye to a coworker who was leaving, etc. It was an exhausting week just from going to work alone... Thankfully I got everything accomplished at work that I set out to do (and I even did an out of office email message and phone message - two things I have never done before) and I feel confident that things will run just fine without me for the time that I'm away.
Because I felt as if I had so much work to accomplish this past week, I was unable to accomplish everything I wanted to around my apartment before leaving on my vacation. Honestly, I just plain ran out of time. There were several things that I kept telling myself I would put off because I still had plenty of time before I left - and then, I simply had no time left. I finished packing my suitcase at midnight the night I left because I hadn't taken care of that earlier (that wasn't one of my brightest moves since I needed to be up at about 3 AM to shower/get ready and then head to the airport for my very early flight). Oh, well. All lessons for next time I guess. Start getting ready for vacation earlier and that's that. Granted, I can't worry about the things I feel as if I didn't accomplish before my trip because they will still be sitting there waiting for me to take care of them upon my return.
I'm probably going to jinx my return trip already by saying thankfully my flights to my parent's were uneventful except for having to inform a gentleman that he was occupying my seat on one of the planes. I had upgraded one of my seats to an exit row seat (it was a few hour flight) and I informed the gentleman that it was my seat. I could tell he was a big guy and would've probably enjoyed sitting in the seat with more leg room (he even tried to convince me to just take his seat since he "was already settled into the seat" and I stood up for myself and told him that it was my seat. He ended up moving and I felt pretty good about not just giving into him. =)
I've only been here for two days (three nights) and quite a bit has already taken place. My parents picked me up at the airport and when we got back to their house, my sister, her husband and two kids were pulling up to the house and they were here visiting for a couple of hours. Overnight we then got a "snow storm" and we woke up to a number of inches of snow and the snow was still falling. In the midst of this blizzard, my sister came to pick me up and take me to the tattoo parlor. It probably wasn't the smartest thing we could've done after all that snow but I am very happy with the result (more on the new tattoo in a minute). Late last night I got a phone call from my (almost) 6 year old nephew asking me if I wanted to go with him to see Santa today so after church with my parents we went to see Santa.
So, about my new tattoo... I have been sending messages back and forth to the artist who did my tattoo this summer with an idea I had for a tattoo for Gypsy's Quest. I told him that it was the name of my blog, the types of things that I write about and that I wanted a tattoo representation of that. I left a lot of the details up to him (other than me telling him that I didn't want the words in the tattoo itself). He sent me a drawing this past week and I fell in love with his design and the imagery he came up with. The tattoo is of a gypsy girl, holding a lantern and coming out of the shadows. In my opinion she has a very determined look on her face and she seems ready to face whatever obstacles in her way. The tattoo takes up my entire forearm and it's pretty sore but I am very impressed with it overall and it will always serve as a visual representation of me and my journey.
Well my dear readers, I should probably bring this to a close for this evening for tomorrow my Dad and I head off of another adventure and we drive about 12 hours away to see my Grandma. I think it will be a very fun trip and I'm sure I'll write about it next week. Have a great week along whatever journey life takes you on!
Sunday, December 8, 2013
Maybes
I reread my post from last week and I noticed that I used the word maybe quite a bit. I don't like how noncommital I was with what I was writing about. The things that I wrote about last week I really want to do for myself so I don't know why the word maybe came up so much. I know in the past I haven't wanted to commit to things in the fear I was going to let other people down if I didn't reach the goals that I had set for myself. The things I wrote about last week were for me to grant permission to let myself be me. Why wouldn't I want to commit to that? From here on out, I am going to commit to that!
I have said in the past that I want to be better for other people. I've thought that I've needed to change who I am, how I look, things I say, etc. in order to be the person that others thing I should be. I am ready to be better for me. I know that there are always going to be those who have an opinion of who they think I should be. I am realizing that I get to decide if their opinion matters or not. That's been an epiphany of sorts for me. Up until now I've been under the impression that just because someone had an opinion of me, they had to be right. I now know that's not the case.
I get to be me because I am the bestest me that there is ever going to be (yes, that's an invented word - bestest). I don't know what made me realize it this week, but I came to the conclusion that some of the things I tell the kids that I work with I could also tell myself. I'm okay with equating myself to kids since kids have a very unique/interesting perspective of pretty much everything. But back to what I was writing... I tell my kids on a regular basis that each of them are the best them there is ever going to be so why can't I say something like that to myself? I also very easily build up the adults around me but I have a very difficult time doing it for myself. This is something that I'm going to work on.
Well, my dear readers, I know I haven't written that much tonight but I have some pretty big things happening this week that I need to work on getting together. Know that I appreciate each and every one of you and I thank you for joining me along my quest. Keep letting those freak flags fly and be the bestest you can be this week! I know I'm going to! No more maybes! =)
I have said in the past that I want to be better for other people. I've thought that I've needed to change who I am, how I look, things I say, etc. in order to be the person that others thing I should be. I am ready to be better for me. I know that there are always going to be those who have an opinion of who they think I should be. I am realizing that I get to decide if their opinion matters or not. That's been an epiphany of sorts for me. Up until now I've been under the impression that just because someone had an opinion of me, they had to be right. I now know that's not the case.
I get to be me because I am the bestest me that there is ever going to be (yes, that's an invented word - bestest). I don't know what made me realize it this week, but I came to the conclusion that some of the things I tell the kids that I work with I could also tell myself. I'm okay with equating myself to kids since kids have a very unique/interesting perspective of pretty much everything. But back to what I was writing... I tell my kids on a regular basis that each of them are the best them there is ever going to be so why can't I say something like that to myself? I also very easily build up the adults around me but I have a very difficult time doing it for myself. This is something that I'm going to work on.
Well, my dear readers, I know I haven't written that much tonight but I have some pretty big things happening this week that I need to work on getting together. Know that I appreciate each and every one of you and I thank you for joining me along my quest. Keep letting those freak flags fly and be the bestest you can be this week! I know I'm going to! No more maybes! =)
Sunday, December 1, 2013
Alive vs. LIVING
An interesting thought/perspective has cropped up several times this week so I think I'm supposed to write about it this week -- that thought/perspective is being alive vs. living your life. As long as we draw breath, we have the opportunity to decide if we're just going to do nothing but breathe for the rest of our lives or if we're going to go out there and truly LIVE. I'll admit that I have gone through different points of my life where it's been all I can do to keep taking breath after breath. I don't want to do that any more -- I'm ready to really get out there and live my life.
I think I've intermittently gone beyond just breathing and have put myself out there to truly live my life but I have then brought myself back to just breathing. I don't want to keep participating in that back and forth; honestly it's exhausting. I'm going to start taking steps to find out what it means for me to live my life. I believe what it takes to live is different for all of us - breathing is the same for all of us, it's what connects us. I think living life though is individual to each and every one of us.
It's just like letting our freak flags fly - we can all fly one but what's on them is individual to each and every one of us. This is something else that I want to explore... I feel as if lately I've talked a really good game about looking for opportunities to let my freak flag fly but when those opportunities arise, I tend to stop myself. There are times where I've talked myself out of it in the moment and other times I've looked back and realized that I let an opportunity to fly my freak flag pass me by. I need to make more of a conscious effort to let others see the "real" me.
I know I've written before about not knowing fully who the "real" me is, however I think I would have a better understanding of that me if I let her out more. I'm not sure why I've been trying so hard to hide her away because I really feel people would like the "real" me if I allowed that side of me to show. But then again, why am I so worried about what other people think? I'm the one who has to live with me, so my opinion is really the only one that should matter, right? This is something that I'm definitely going to work on.
I think maybe I'm writing some of these things to not only remind myself of them but to maybe remind/encourage some of you, my dear readers, as well. This time of year can get the best of us and we get so wrapped up in things that may not even matter in the long run. People may or not remember in a year or so what you bought them for the holidays; you won't remember what "Black Friday"/"Cyber Monday" deals you did or didn't get; but if you work on yourself that's a gift you give to yourself (and those who love you).
I know that people tend to focus on themselves after the first of the year and the whole New Year's Resolution thing. I think this year however, I'm going to give myself a gift this Christmas - I'm going to give myself the gift of permission. Permission to be myself. Permission to let my freak flag fly. Permission to show "me" to those around me (and resist the temptation to apologize for it). As the month goes on, I'll let you know how that's working for me...
Well my dear readers, I should probably think about going to bed (after enjoying this nice, long 4 day weekend for me) in order to prepare for the work week ahead. Try your best (and I'll do the same) to let those freak flags fly this week! And remember to LIVE not just be alive! =)
I think I've intermittently gone beyond just breathing and have put myself out there to truly live my life but I have then brought myself back to just breathing. I don't want to keep participating in that back and forth; honestly it's exhausting. I'm going to start taking steps to find out what it means for me to live my life. I believe what it takes to live is different for all of us - breathing is the same for all of us, it's what connects us. I think living life though is individual to each and every one of us.
It's just like letting our freak flags fly - we can all fly one but what's on them is individual to each and every one of us. This is something else that I want to explore... I feel as if lately I've talked a really good game about looking for opportunities to let my freak flag fly but when those opportunities arise, I tend to stop myself. There are times where I've talked myself out of it in the moment and other times I've looked back and realized that I let an opportunity to fly my freak flag pass me by. I need to make more of a conscious effort to let others see the "real" me.
I know I've written before about not knowing fully who the "real" me is, however I think I would have a better understanding of that me if I let her out more. I'm not sure why I've been trying so hard to hide her away because I really feel people would like the "real" me if I allowed that side of me to show. But then again, why am I so worried about what other people think? I'm the one who has to live with me, so my opinion is really the only one that should matter, right? This is something that I'm definitely going to work on.
I think maybe I'm writing some of these things to not only remind myself of them but to maybe remind/encourage some of you, my dear readers, as well. This time of year can get the best of us and we get so wrapped up in things that may not even matter in the long run. People may or not remember in a year or so what you bought them for the holidays; you won't remember what "Black Friday"/"Cyber Monday" deals you did or didn't get; but if you work on yourself that's a gift you give to yourself (and those who love you).
I know that people tend to focus on themselves after the first of the year and the whole New Year's Resolution thing. I think this year however, I'm going to give myself a gift this Christmas - I'm going to give myself the gift of permission. Permission to be myself. Permission to let my freak flag fly. Permission to show "me" to those around me (and resist the temptation to apologize for it). As the month goes on, I'll let you know how that's working for me...
Well my dear readers, I should probably think about going to bed (after enjoying this nice, long 4 day weekend for me) in order to prepare for the work week ahead. Try your best (and I'll do the same) to let those freak flags fly this week! And remember to LIVE not just be alive! =)
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