Bootstraps

I'm working on pulling up my bootstraps and getting myself away from wallowing.  Honestly, I wanted to use the saying, "I'm ready to put on my big girl panties and deal with things" but I didn't think putting that as my title this week would go over very well...  =)

While I have always been one that enjoys a good wallow, I have decided that I need to pull myself out of this hole and change how I look at things (or at least make an attempt).  Rather than beating myself up over the things that I don't accomplish each day, I need to start looking at it as a head start on my to-do list for the following day.  Looking at it that way, I'm not behind, I'm ahead.  I realize that I can only get just so much accomplished in any given day and it doesn't do me any good to focus on those other things.  If I look at the things that didn't get accomplished and only look at those, I will only frustrate myself and feel defeated before the next day even begins.  I think that feeling of defeat is one of the things that has been bringing me down.

Okay.... even though I swore this post was going to be free of wallowing, something just happened that I need to get off my chest and I'll go back to work on not digging myself a deeper hole...  Why is it that people come to me looking for advice with their relationships?  Lots of my friends use me as a sounding board/psychologist almost in regards to their relationships.  I'm more than happy to help them if I can but why do they want to come to a person who hasn't had the best track record in terms of relationships?  I know I've only written about the wasband but my other past relationships haven't been the best either looking back on them.  Maybe one day I'll understand it but today is not that day...

Back to what I was writing about before.  Another way that I'm trying to pick myself up by my bootstraps is I'm (once again) not trying to be so judgmental when I look at myself in the mirror.  It doesn't always work but I'm making an attempt.  I trying to wear some nicer things to work since I'm in the management position but I know that I also need to be comfortable as well or I'm not going to be able to continue to keep it up.  I'm a t-shirt and jeans kind of girl so work clothes really have to be comfortable so I don't just go back to that outfit.  One way that I'm trying to be more comfortable with dressing that way is to have fun shoes.

What kind of a difference can shoes make do you ask?  Let me tell you about my experience.  I learned about having fun shoes from a book that I read (and have read many times and I'm probably due to read it again since it's been awhile) where the main woman in it was obsessed with having what she referred to as power shoes.  I knew I needed a new pair of work shoes and I decided to buy shoes that are red metallic heels.  Just like the woman in the book, when I felt as if I needed a little pick me up at work, I just looked at my whose and felt that little surge of energy/power/or whatever it was in the knowledge that I was wearing fun shoes.  I have since bought a few more pairs and am just waiting on them to arrive (I bought them online).  I'm really hoping they'll have the effect I desire when they come.

I got a message today that was an exciting one.  I was contacted by a local dancer to ask me if I would be willing to dance at a fundraising show that she's putting together.  While her event is on the same day as a work event I have, because of the timing, I will be able to do both things.  I am very honored that she thought to ask me to be part of her event and I'm honestly looking forward to it.  I ordered a custom belly dance sword and I should be getting it this week (I was supposed to get it yesterday but I wasn't here to sign for it at time of delivery so it headed back to the post office).  I am really excited about my sword because she designed it completely for me and will never make another one like it.  I have seen photos of it and can't wait to see it in person!

A project I have given myself and am looking forward to is another dancer recommended getting a rifle case in order to protect my sword at performances.  I found one that I like (and the case is rectangular so it doesn't look like a rifle case) but it's plain black.  While I'm one that normally likes black, I don't think a plain black case is going to work for my sword.  I've bought some fun things in order to decorate the case with (lots of colorful, shiny/sparkly things) and it will be a project I can just keep adding to over time.  I'm going to start working on it tomorrow I think because it's actually a three-day weekend for me.  YAY!

Even though it's a three-day weekend, I should probably think about wrapping this up and heading to bed before too much longer.  I know that I didn't really write too much about my plans for pulling myself up by my bootstraps but I figure that will be a work in progress just like my sword case.  I wish you the best this upcoming week my dear readers and hope that something comes across your path that makes you feel special (because each and one of you are)!  =)