Just when I thought things were figured out...

Well, I heard from what I thought was going to be my new job yesterday and they decided that salary negotiations were going to become, "this is what your salary is going to be... so what if it's $1.50 less per hour than we told you it was going to be, that's what the salary will be..." So, I have by close of business tomorrow to give them my answer. Hmmmmm..... let me think.....

After a very tearful discussion with my parents (I was the one crying, not them), and some number crunching, I have decided that the best option (mostly financially) is going to be to stay where I am. I have come to terms with that decision. One of the things my Mom and Dad both said (geez, I love my parents; and NO, I'm not just saying that) is that my quest isn't over (even though that's how I initially felt), it is just changing, as quests have a tendency to do. Quests have never promised to be easy and I don't know why I thought mine was coming to an end just because I was moving.

I am proud of myself for at least considering making this big of a move, on my own (with help but still facing being alone after getting there), and yes, it sucks that I won't be doing it now but that doesn't mean it will never happen. Who, knows...

Maybe I need to compare my quest to the ocean. The ocean is ever changing with the waves constantly hitting upon the shore. But that doesn't stop it. It goes out and it comes back in; over and over; never giving up. If you have ever just watched the ocean (which is one of my favorite pastimes), there is no rhyme or reason to where the waves wash up or even how the waves look. One minute they may be lapping peacefully on the shore and the next, the waves are crashing. I just have to view that my quest is crashing upon the shore right now but I have the choice to "just keep swimming" (thanks Mom!) or let myself drown in self-pity.

As for now, I choose to "just keep swimming" and we'll see where I end up....