Being me

Along my journey of self discovery, I have had some bumps along the road and made some questionable decisions.  I get as if something that happened today was a small victory along this journey, some may say it was a questionable decision, but it felt really good to get it off my chest...  I was approached by the pastor today (and if you've been following my readings, you know that she and I do not see eye to eye) and she said, "Have you tried, you know, to not be so weird?"  My response?  "Have you tried, you know, to not be so judgmental?"  There was no answer given to my question and it was one of those fleeting thoughts at the time, "should I have said that" and my answer to myself was "yes" because it needed to be asked.

I don't mind people asking me about my personal style; what I do mind is people asking me to change who I am in order to make themselves more comfortable.  I don't know if it's from their own inner weirdo that is jealous that mine is unleashed or what it is but I do get tired of people trying/wanting me to fit inside the box that they want to define me.  Rather than letting it effect me, I am going to continue to be me and ignore what other people may say.  I am trying to work some on my confidence and not worry so much about what other people comment - whether it's in my earshot or not.

This past week at work has been filled with me trying to clear out my email in-box as well as find the top of my desk which became buried in the two weeks I was away (one week for official work travel and the following week being with family for a funeral).  I still have a pile on my desk but I have the goal to get through all of it in this upcoming week.  One of the accomplishments I did have from this past week is I removed a very old set of plastic venetian blinds from my office and hung a beautiful set of golden oak wooden blinds to cover the window.  While I was standing on the chair to start hanging the new brackets, one of the maintenance guys walked into the building and asked if I needed his assistance - I told him that I knew what I was doing (thanks, Dad!) but if I got to the point of frustration and was trying to pound in a screw with a hammer or something, I would give him a call.  I almost got to that frustration point on the last screw because the screw head stripped and I had to remove it with a pair of pliers (not an easy task working in the small area of the bracket) but I got it removed, was able to replace the screw and hang the blinds.  I think I impressed some of the people at work by not just giving up/giving in and calling the maintenance guy to "fix" it but that I accomplished it myself.  There are times in my current job where I miss having opportunities to accomplish tasks such as this...

I had the opportunity today to be the substitute teacher for the dance class that I sometimes work with and I felt as if the ladies learned a lot.  I took the time to ask them what moves they might be struggling with to see if I could explain it in a different way for them in the hopes they could have a better understanding.  It is a wonderful feeling when you see someone finally "get" a move and they become more comfortable with it.  I get the chance to work with them again next week and it's my hope that I will help them out with more moves then.

Because I have several meetings at work this week, I know that I'm going to have to come up with a game plan in order to get my desk cleared off, attend the meetings, accomplish the tasks after the meetings and deal with anything else that comes up.  In order to feel like I'm not losing myself in the process, I know that I will need to have some muchness in my wardrobe/accessories.  In order to do this, I should probably bring this to a close so I can prepare for my week.  Thank you for joining me on my journey!  =)