Qualifications

While talking with my Mom on the phone today, she gave me a phrase that is going to be added to my arsenal of life mottos; "you are not qualified to run the universe, so stop trying!"  I have been taking on too much once again at work and am trying to do the work of more than one person.  Because of this, I have no time or energy left for myself to accomplish all of the work and mistakes are happening and I am not one that likes to make mistakes.  Since there is so much on my plate (both in and out of work) I haven't been able to give the amount of detail to each task that I would normally like and I've been kicking myself for that.  I definitely know that I'm not qualified to run the universe but I'm trying to control too much of the work universe and that's just not necessarily working out for me.

Things at work have felt very one-sided lately; where in a give and take situation, I'm the one doing all the giving and my staff are doing all the taking....  While I know that I am the boss and that sometimes happens, I do feel there is a time where I get to say enough is enough and I get to put my foot down.  I find it interesting that I don't mind at all (and laugh even) if a child tells me that they're going to "tell their mommy/daddy on me" but I then feel the need to walk on eggshells with my staff. 
I need to stop worrying so much about what they're going to think about me or say about me behind my back and just have them get the work done.  For whatever reason I am allowing my staff to run the building rather than me and I need to take that power back so I can get my own work done and stop taking back what I'm delegating to them.

There are times where I get caught up in being concerned with what people think about me rather than allowing me to be me.  There is a comic strip where there is a woman who is a mild mannered/timid housewife usually but she has an alter ego who is a jalapeno rattle snake chili eating biker babe who occasionally comes out.  I think I need to let my alter ego out to play more often - she is getting squelched down by the version of "me" that I think I need to be on a regular basis and it's making me miserable.  Mom was joking with me today that maybe I need to watch the movie Sybil and find the right side of my personality for the situation that I find myself in at any given time - that, or if someone wants the "nice" side of me, "oh, so sorry.... she's not available right now, you have to deal with me...."  I think, if nothing else, it might help make the work day more interesting.

With tomorrow being leap-day, I'm hoping for something magical/mysterious to happen.  I'm not necessarily sure why I'm hoping that this day is going to hold some mystical powers but it's a day that only comes around every four years, so why not?  If nothing else, knowing that tomorrow is leap day, I'm hoping that it gives me a positive start to what it seems is going to be an overwhelming week.  I'm supposed to start tomorrow with a meeting with the boss to go over "stuff;" Tuesday I have another meeting and an interview to potentially promote a staff member; Wednesday I get to attend a division manager meeting for my boss; Thursday I think I have a conference call; and Friday I have to stay late to teach a class after work. On top of all of the work pressure, I have dance Monday/Wednesday/Saturday and then choir on Thursday.  I'm hoping at some point in the week to take some time for me but I'm not sure when that's going to be able to occur...

All of that said, I think I'm going to bring this to a close for tonight and read a little bit before going to bed.  I have a new book that I at least want to start looking at before falling asleep so we'll see how that goes.  I also want to give some thoughts to my qualifications/personalities before the start of this week; even though I know I don't need to have all the answers tonight.  I wish you a muchness filled week and that you have (or make) opportunities to let you shine!  Thanks for joining me!  =)