Expectations vs. Reality

It's a new year so everyone is talking about resolutions, setting new goals, trying to reinvent themselves, etc.  Has anyone ever stopped and asked why?  Why is the pressure put on us to change who we are because it's the beginning of the year?  Questions like this always make me think of one of my favorite quotes by Dr. Seuss - "why fit in when you were born to stand out?"  What does this have to do with resolutions you might ask - simple - I'm not making any except one........  Rather than always worrying about others, I'm going to worry some about myself.  I'm not saying this to be selfish but I need to learn how to take my wants/needs into consideration; and I can't do that if I'm always trying to please others by going out of my way to worry about them.

Okay, I lied.....  I am going to make one other change this year - I'm going to work on being more kind.  Not only am I going to be more kind to others, but I'm going to be kinder to myself.  One of the things encompassed in that is allowing myself to be me.  I feel as if lately I have become so concerned with how others may view me or what they might say that I haven't been as kind to myself in terms of my appearance.  Granted, there are some things I would change about my appearance (mostly in terms of weight) but that doesn't mean I have to change wearing wild colors/crazy jewelry/funky shoes if those are the things that I want to wear.  If I want to wear a blazer, why does it have to be black?  Why can't my blazer be fuchsia or teal or crimson or sequins covered?  Why can't my shoes be covered with glitter if I want them to be?  If these things make me feel good about myself, why not embrace them if they're going to help me be kinder to myself?

For whatever reason, it seems as if we live in a society where it's almost expected of us to tear others down and to stab them in the back.  I wasn't raised that way.  I don't understand the beating down of others just to make myself higher up on the food chain.  I grew up in the Midwest and have been told that I was raised to be "Midwest nice."  Maybe that's my struggle living on one of the coasts - they don't understand "Midwest nice" and I don't understand being overly cutthroat (even though I enjoy watching Cutthroat Kitchen).

While on the topic of things I don't understand, I don't understand why we tell kids to reach for the stars or to dream big when we discourage adults to do the same thing.  We tell adults to get their heads out of the clouds and to stay grounded.  We tell kids that it's okay to color outside the lines but as adults, we have to stay within the constrains of those lines.  What changes along the way from what we tell kids and what we tell adults?  And why do we do it?  Is it, because as adults we've forgotten how to dream big, reach for the stars or color just for the fun of it?  Are we just too busy trying to strive for perfection that we not willing to make mistakes?  This is something that I want to change for myself personally - not as a resolution but as a personal lifestyle change.

Well my dear readers, I'm going to bring this to a close for tonight; I have a new book I've been looking forward to starting and I think tonight is the night I'm going to start it.  I've given myself some things to think about and while I know I'm not going to come up with any answers overnight, might as well start now.  Have a good week and thank you for joining me!  =)