Survive

Good evening, dear readers!  Let me begin by telling you about my whale watching adventure that I decided to take myself on when I had a day off of work this past week.  I had the opportunity to see not only one but two Orca whales (which I've never seen outside of Sea World before) and at least 15-20 humpback whales during a "feeding frenzy."  We also got to see lots of dolphins and hundreds of sea lions playing in the ocean.  I was able to capture some amazing photos and a lot of photos that just ended up being of water.  I thought I had a picture of a mermaid but I think it was just a piece of kelp floating by.  Maybe next time...

I was very glad to start my week with this adventure because I ended up not having such a good week.  I don't know if I'm just putting too much pressure on myself in different aspects of my life but I had days this past week where I didn't feel as if I was doing anything right.  That wasn't a good place to mentally/emotionally be and I'm hoping that I can continue to work myself out of that place. Probably also didn't help that I ended up with a pretty nasty cold/laryngitis this past week so I didn't sleep well on top of everything else that was going on.

The combination of not being in a good place mentally/emotionally, being sick and not sleeping well made my thoughts turn to the wasband.  Tomorrow marks the five year point of him walking out and I am trying to think about all of the positive things that have happened in my life since that point.  Yes, I have had some ups and downs over that time because I don't want the alternative (where I spend the rest of my life wondering what could have been if we would've stayed together).  This year we have been separated as long as we were married.  That's kind of a shocking thought to me.  There are times I can't believe it's really been five years.

One of the things that I keep trying to remind myself is with all of the things that have happened in that time, I am still standing.  I may not be at the place in my life that I expected but I have survived and that's what's most important.  I have fallen in love with a new song and I think it's going to become my 'anthem.'  The song is "Roar" by Katy Perry.  There are times where I just feel let need to sing it at the top of my lungs and I seem to feel better when I do.  Every time I watch the music video for it I just have to giggle (the guy in it gets eaten by a tiger and I can't help but picture you know who when that happens; and no I'm not talking about Voldemort for you Harry Potter fans).

I know that there will come a time where I will be able to look back on this time in my life and know that it was a stepping stone to bigger and better things.  My Mom sent me something this week that I'm going to have to turn into a wallpaper or a print so I can remember it -- Never cry for the person who hurts you...  Just smile and say, "Thanks for giving me the chance to find someone better than you..."  That's going to be one to the next things I work on in my quest.

Well, my dear readers, I think I need to bring this to a close for the evening.  I have a busy week ahead of me with work (along with my regular work responsibilities, I have to teach a two day customer service class this week that I don't know that I'm ready for) so I should probably try and relax a little before heading to bed.  Along with everything, I know that I am really going to try and find opportunities to let my freak flag fly.  I hope you do the same!