"How did you end up here?"

I have been asked this question several times over the last week or so. For whatever reason, this week several people have found out that I didn't grow up in this area and the question, "How did you end up HERE?" came up as it usually does... Well, I answered said question with the story of how I ended up here (the whole moving to the area with the wasband, him choosing to divorce me here and I stayed in the area for my job and then dancing) and I actually had one person tell me, "that kind of stuff actually happens in real life and not just in the movies?" Honestly if I had to fashion my life after a movie, I probably would have picked a different one. Oh, well... I am making the best of my situation and actually trying to thrive in spite of it all.

I discovered another aspect of my life that the same question (just in a different format) applies to - how did I end up as a 31 year old who doesn't really know how to cook? It's not that I don't have the capability to cook (as my Grandma tells me, "If you can read, you can cook"); it's mostly that I've never really had the desire to cook. Today I feel pretty accomplished - I made myself vanilla flavored French toast. Yum!! Not to toot my own horn but it was AMAZING! I guess I will just have to be careful with my new found interest in cooking because I definitely don't want to gain my weight back.....

I do think that starting to cook for myself is going to help boost my confidence some and it might also help some with my weight loss because if I cook for myself I won't eat as many prepackaged meals or eat out because they're "easier" meals. Granted, cooking for one can be a challenge from what I have discovered when I've attempted to cook in the past because I, for one, don't like to eat the same thing day after day. So, I guess I will have to start finding recipes that I do like and then finding ways to cut the ingredients so I don't make as much (since most recipes are for 4 or more servings and I don't need to make that much for myself).

Something else that I know will help my eating habits is attempting, once again, to remove some of the stress from my life. I know that I have written about it before and haven't really found ways in which to reduce said stress but I want to make a more conscious effort to do so. I know that there are some stressors that I can't necessarily control but I can work on not always having them take over my brain (especially when it comes time to sleep). I think one of these days someone needs to invent a device that allows you to turn off the thoughts running through your head so you can sleep at night. That would definitely be something I would invest in if invented....

I am also going to attempt to find time to introduce into my schedule that I want to do again. I seem to spend so much time doing things that I feel I have to do for other people that I've put aside things that I've wanted to work on. I have two blankets that I've wanted to cross-stitch (something I enjoy doing) and I haven't worked on either of them for awhile now. Yesterday I spent several hours working on one of them and that felt really good. Since I have tomorrow off of work, I think I am going to spend more time working on it just for some "me" time.

Actually, I think I'm going to turn off the computer for tonight and work on some stitching and to see where I end up... Hopefully it's in a good place... =)