The Casbah is over and not only did I survive, I did GREAT!! I was the first solo dance (we did a beginner's class group dance first and then I did my dance) and I forgot it part way through but I never stopped! One lady came up to me afterwards and told me that after the group dance she was hoping I was going to do one of the solos and then after my solo she's thinking of starting class. =) I thought that was a pretty cool compliment. Another lady asked me how long I have lived in the country and when I told her my entire life, she asked if I had visited the Middle East at least because she thought I looked as if I was from (or visited) Algeria or someplace like that.
When my instructor introduced me, she told everyone that my Mom got me started belly dancing only a few months ago and that Mom had also made my costume for me. I thought it was pretty neat introduction.
Lots of the other dancers told me that I had great energy and they were impressed with my first solo! There was even another instructor who danced last night and she told me that she can't wait to see me on a stage again.My instructor was the final dancer and she danced with zills (finger cymbals) and then she put a candle holder on her head and danced around. Pretty impressive. =)
After all of the solos were over, my instructor put some music on and we all just danced around doing our "own thing." While I was exhausted afterwards, it was SO much fun and I am looking forward to performing again.
On the other end of the emotional spectrum, today I said "goodbye" to my wasband. Tomorrow he is moving to another city in the state (a number of hours away) so this is, most likely, the last time I will ever see him. I guess it is kind of appropriate that it rained today.... It was bittersweet to have the opportunity to be able to see him one last time and have a chance to talk with him some. While it was difficult, it was a chance for me to be able to end that chapter in my life. I will never forget him or our time together (and he told me that he will always remember me and doesn't, even now, regret marrying me) but, unfortunately for us, it just wasn't meant to be forever.
I do, honestly, wish the best for him and his own adventures. He wished the same for me. He said no matter what, he believes that good things are in store for me and I just have to show the world the "real me" and he thinks no one will be able to resist me.
While in some ways it was difficult for me to hear those things for him, it was also good for me to hear it from him, I think. To hear from him that he still thinks I am a good person after all that we have been through the last 16 months (and to see in his eyes that he truly meant it) touched my heart and caused me to realize that he's right...
Even though I have made mistakes in my life and I wasn't the perfect wife for him, that doesn't mean I can't be the wife someone else is looking for. Now that this chapter is truly closed, maybe I will be able to find that man....
But, for now, I will continue to focus on me and the things that I love doing (belly dance) and if I happen to find him, great. =) And if I don't find him anytime soon, that's great too...
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