Reflecting

I have been doing some reflecting on my musing of mirrors (pun not intended) and I'm trying to look at them from a different point of view.  When Alice experienced through the looking glass, she had amazing and one of a kind adventures; yes, some people would argue drugs had some hand in that but that's besides the point...  Rather than fighting the reflection in the mirror, what if I instead embraced Alice's notion of "six impossible things before breakfast" and made that philosophy my own?  How would my perspective/perception change?  This is a concept I would like to work on.

I posted last week about mirrors and how I'm feeling about them currently.  I am still struggling with mirrors (more specifically my reflection in those mirrors) but I am working towards seeing in my reflection what other people see.  My sister-in-law gave me a different way to look at things that I am overly critical of when I look at myself.  What she said is, "It's so hard to see for ourselves what others see in us. For example you have wrinkles so that means you have laughed and learned. The tired eyes show you have a passion for what you are doing and give it everything you've got. The grey hair show that while you might be stressed you've persevered. And the weight means you have provided for yourself and are able to indulge (which isn't a bad thing). Don't look at the "flaws" as negatives look at how you achieved them and what that means about you."  Not only was I humbled by her kind words, I was also kind of shocked.  It's not as if my sister-in-law and I don't get along, we do, it's just that she and I don't often get to spend much time together since we live far apart from one another.

As we approach the different holidays, it makes me realize just how far I live from family.  This isn't a new concept to me since growing up we lived approximately 700 miles (about a 14 hour drive with stops since there were 4 little kids in the vehicle) from family so we didn't get to see them as often as anyone would've liked.  I currently live about 2400 miles from my immediate family so I definitely don't get to see them near enough.  I cherish each and every opportunity that I get to spend with the members of my family.  Since I don't get to visit as much as I'd like, I embrace spending time talking to family on the phone.  I talk to my parents weekly (mostly Mom) and those conversations give me strength.

This time of year can definitely be a struggle because there is so much going on - not only the holidays but this time of year is a flux of emotions for me.  There is the joy of the holidays, missing my family, this is the time of year that the wasband left, and would have been the time of year of our anniversary.  Last year I didn't seem to struggle as much emotionally as I feel I am this year.  It's been forever since my dreams have been invaded by the wasband and I've dreams of him more in the last week than I've cared to.  Hopefully that's done and over with and I can move on with my life rather be dragged down by my past...

It probably doesn't help that it's been kind of dreary here lately and today was just wet and cold.  I have never done well with rain and I think that might have something to do with how I've been feeling lately.  My challenge is to find positives and to embrace them.  I danced a solo yesterday at a performance and I was contacted by the coordinator and she told me that someone said that I was the best performer and that I was the only dancer that seemed happy while dancing.  Knowing that someone said that about my performance really touched me - I just need to remember that going into this next week.

Well my dear readers, I'm going to bring this to a close for tonight so I can get ready for the week ahead.  We are serving two Thanksgiving lunches this week (we have two morning preschool classes so one for each), one of the head honchos will be visiting my work site, and my right hand person at work will be gone for a week-long training - it should be interesting...  Have a great week!  =)