Adventures...

The adventure of my leap of faith is starting to get real; I wrote my official resignation letter today which I will present to my boss tomorrow.  Once I've given my official resignation, I will start to tell the kids at work and their families.  Even though many of them will be on vacation this week since school is out, I will probably send out the first email to them either tomorrow or Tuesday and follow up with a hard copy written notice the following week.  I know that it's going to be difficult telling the kids and their families but I figure I should start telling them sooner rather than later so they can ask their questions and hear about it from me.

This past week at work we had a staff meeting where I announced that I would be leaving next month.  It also came up today at church that I'll be leaving, too.  At both places, the strangest reaction happened - I had people coming up to me telling me how much they're going to miss me and they don't want me to leave - all of which was a shock to me.  This reaction is coming from people who have often treated me as if I've invisible or they look at me like I'm the outcast they can't wait to get rid of.  The fact that they reacted like this, just kind of threw me for a loop.

In my work around the apartment this weekend, I took the family photos that I had displayed on a shelf down, wrapped them and put them in a box.  That simple act already has this apartment feeling less like "home".  In living here, I was told not to put any holes in the walls so family photos were displayed on a shelf while others never made it out of a box.  Granted, the ones that stayed in the box now contain the ex's of three out of four kids in the family so it's probably better that they remained in a box.  With me living closer to the rest of my family maybe we can have some new photos taken with the current members of the family for me to put up in my new home/apartment or wherever I end up.  I realized that even the photos I have of my nephews are a couple of years old at this point but they are the ones that I have; so with them coming down off the shelves, it already makes it seem more empty.

I know that in order to make this move, it's going to have to feel less like home in order to get everything packed away and actually move.  I think part of it is bringing up some memories/emotions of the last time I moved (after the divorce was finalized) but I'm trying hard not to necessarily dwell on those feelings.  Maybe part of it is also coming from the time of year it is - this is the time of the year that the wasband walked out leaving only a letter.  I am trying to realize how far I have come in the last 8 years but sometimes it's difficult to push those memories/emotions away.  I guess this is all part of my quest...

Last night, in order to help remind me about my quest, I watched "Man of LaMancha" while I was looking through boxes.  That's always been one of those movies that helps to put my quest in perspective - Don Quixote was the persona of a mad man who dreamed of a life of chivalry who became a knight errant.  Some might say that my quest to move cross country is mad but sometimes the maddest of quests means you make the best of friends (as Don Quixote had Sancho and Duncinea) and your story is remembered.  Those things sound pretty good to me.

Well, my dear readers, I should probably bring this to a close for the evening.  The kids don't have school this week so we have three days of full day programming (from 7 am - 6 pm) so we'll see what kind of trouble we can get into.  Thank you for joining me along this quest and I hope you take some time this week to reflect on what you're thankful for.  I am thankful for you, my dear readers!  =)