Stress

While I was flipping through channels today, I heard a quote on a commercial that has stuck with me for the remainder of the afternoon/evening.  The quote was, "Rather than trying to control everything, why not just let things be out of control for awhile?"  I reacted kind of the same way the character hearing that did, "WHAT?!"  Even though I know that I need to do that, I'm not quite sure how I would... I know that for my own mental/emotional/physical well being I need to learn how to step back sometimes and not try and fix absolutely everything.  Yes, that's going to take some effort on my part but I know that it's a necessary one.  I need to learn how to apply that mentality to different areas of my life in an attempt to bring some balance back.


I often find it difficult to not attempt to control things I think because it's just me.  Yes, I have coworkers and friends but when it comes to having things keep me up at night, that's when it's just me.  I don't have anyone in the middle of the night to help keep me asleep in order to function during my busy days.  When I find myself getting stressed, I toss and turn at night.  Even though I know that about myself, I still find myself not always getting the sleep that I need at night.  I'm to the point that I may have to possibly look into taking some sort of a sleep aid or something so I can do what needs to be done.


I think one of the things that I need to learn how to be okay with is taking the occasional day off of work since I am so busy.  My weeks and my weekends have been jam-packed and it's becoming too much for me to handle.  I'm going to find myself on the edge of a nervous breakdown before I know it and that's not a good feeling.  In order to take a break, I am going to have to learn how to use the word "no" in at least one area of my life (whether it be in the area of work, church, dance) even if it's just the occasional "no."


Maybe one of the things that I need to do is find inspiration again.  I need to look into finding a new piece of music to create a brand new solo to or something....


Okay, just had a monkey wrench thrown into my thoughts of finding balance and de-stressing - - - I just got an unexpected text from a coworker letting me know that one of the staff is having her baby a month early and we now have to go to an unwritten/unknown contingency plan.  I know that we will make everything come together and make it work but it just adds to an already stressful life.  I am hoping and praying that everything goes well and my friend/coworker has a safe delivery and healthy baby especially since I know it's earlier than expected.


Since I'm not sure what I'm going to be walking into when I go into work tomorrow, I think I'm going to close this done in an attempt to get some sleep tonight.  I am going to try my hardest to not over-think things so I can get some sleep tonight.  We'll see if that works for me or not...